Growing up in the Black community, there has always been this collective negative attitude towards therapy. Parents and other family members have always turned their noses at therapy believing that “family business stays with family.” In most households, therapy still isn’t even an option. Some other beliefs that keep people from therapy are things like: 

• Venting to friends is just as good as therapy.
• No one can know you better than yourself so it’s a waste to pay someone. 
• Only crazy people go to therapy.
• Mental health isn’t a problem in our community.
• God and prayer will get you through anything. 

Therapy is so taboo in our community, that even in 2020 with the mindfulness revolution taking place, I still find myself wondering what people think about me when I tell them I go to therapy. I wonder if they think something is wrong with me. Thanks to therapy and meditation, I am able notice these thoughts (aka judgments) and shift to thinking of all the great things that therapy has opened for me. The ability to notice and shift my thoughts being one of the many blessings that I gained from therapy which I am so grateful for. 

I found my first therapist back in 2017 through an online search. It took a few tries to find the right therapist for me but with time, I have been able to unpack a lot of different blind spots from my past that have prevented me from living the life I desire. Therapy, along with many other mental health practices such as meditation, journaling, affirmations, etc., have allowed me to accept and love myself.

In fact, therapy has impacted my life so much, it became very important to me to introduce my munchkin, Eboni to it some years ago. It has given her space to express her thoughts without worrying.

Here are some reasons why I believe therapy is important:

• Therapy gives you a safe space to 100% be yourself because your session is 100% about you. You get to set the pace and decide which areas of your life you want to heal and work on. Very rarely do we stop and take time for ourselves. You matter and therefore you deserve a space in your life dedicated to just you.
• The most important relationship you have is the one with yourself. Therapy fosters this relationship by giving you a space to openly express yourself and communicate your feelings and thoughts without judgment. Your therapist can help you reconcile things in your past that are holding you back from being the best version of yourself. You also learn how you have been talking to yourself and ways to shift those thoughts (like I mentioned above).
• Talking to an objective person with no stake in the situation allows for you to get an unbiased opinion/perspective on things. There aren’t any feelings or secret motives fueling their advice which allows them considers the entire scope of the situation. As we all know there are many sides to any story and sometimes, we get so caught up in our feelings/wants/desires that they cloud our better judgment. A therapist can help you weed through that judgment to do what is best for you.
• Through learning to understand and express yourself, you develop a level of compassion when it comes to dealing with yourself and others. Compassion allows you to see yourself and others as humans.

Things have changed a lot in the last 5 years concerning mental health. Therapy is losing the negative stigma that it once faced. More and more people, young, old, regardless of race have begun to embrace different methods of self care. The benefits of therapy truly keep giving long after you’ve let this strange person all up in your business!

Therapy Resources:

Search for a therapist at www.therapyforblackgirls.com or www.psychologytoday.com

Or find a virtual therapist at Talkspace Online Therapy – www.talkspace.com

All other therapy resources are welcomed in the comments! <3